“Rhyme goes the song” and “boo goes the fans.”
No those aren’t lines from a Dr. Suess book but they sure as h*ll sound a lot like Luke Bryan’s latest unreleased song “Down Goes The Whiskey.” The 50-year-old five-time ACM Entertainer of the Year has once again found himself on the wrong side of the internet with fans clouding his comments online underneath the new tune from his upcoming album, Signs.
In an effort to promote his ninth studio album dropping in less than a month on September 18, Bryan’s been teasing the tracklist and what you can expect from a few of the songs— which includes another one of his rhyming scheme, list-heavy, country-cliche beats. Unfortunately, after the massive wave of internet hate he received for his goofy “Fish Hunt Golf Drink,” just about anything the Georgia native puts out now is bound to be scrutinized to the third degree.
Including Track No. 8, which was co-written by Jeb Gibson (who also co-wrote “Prayin’ In a Deer Stand”), Whitney Duncan, and Jonathan Singleton. Don’t get me wrong, the song itself actually has all the bones of a catchy, simple, inoffensive country banger.
From an instrumental standpoint, the steel-guitar-heavy production and even its rhyming scheme are pretty promising, with a satisfying melody that builds up into the chorus. Unfortunately, the lyrics fell a bit flat in the eyes of the internet, with people now ripping the country boy’s latest lyrical poem to shreds.
If you’ve yet to listen to the song, I recommend you do so now for optimal laughing opportunity when I share with you these spoofed comments.
Now that you’re well acquainted with the “slam goes the door, flyin’ goes the dust” Mary-Had-a-Little-Lamb-esque tune, I present to you the internet’s finest offerings for some potential new lyric additions to Bryan’s track. Insanely enough some comments like the oh so clever “Fart goes the butt” (with over 55K likes) and “Down goes the volume” (24.5K likes) have amassed more likes than the video iteself (nearly 18k likes).
Beyond everyone’s creative takes on lyric parodies, many others in the comments have continued to throw the “Chat GPT” insult around, saying the song sounds like it was pulled straight from an AI prompt with others just flat out begging him to “unrelease this.”
As we all know though, Bryan’s never been one to shy away from Internet hate, notably clapping back at a user who slammed “Fish Hunt Golf Drink” earlier this year by affirming: “It’s called a fun song… Go get a boat, quit scrolling on your phone all day” and “Who are you? Chill on the adderall.”
Fast forward a few months, and now the “Country Girl (Shake It For Me)” singer is embracing his (for better or for worse) viral hit with a line of “Fish Hunt Golf Drink” merch and even a “Climb Tree” camo hat. Which I’m not gonna lie…kinda goes hard.
Moral of the story: “Fun goes the Luke” and “care goes out the door.” With over 30 No. 1 hits and a well-established career in country music, I think it’s safe to say Bryan is more focused on enjoying himself than digging deep for soul-touching country hits. He can pretty much do whatever he pleases at this point in his career, and I have a feeling this next album is bound to exemplify exactly that. For better or worse…